Polish festivus redux

It is so hot out today, but I will gladly deal with heat far, far, far more than I will the cold. Basically because of the conditions (driving, etc.) The heat doesn't cause you to slide all over the road, get stranded in your house with no food, or give you pneumonia. Again, welcome heat!!

So my lovely day of the best Polish Festlival begins with work until like 3pm. (BTW, we all lived at the house on 5th Street this summer) Then as Bill, Brad, Ryan Casteneda, Tom Slavens, and myself get ready to go, the night was beginning to have a weird but good feeling. Much like you knew it was going to be a good night. Ryan and I start drinking about 5pm and who knows why, playing chess while everyone else is getting ready. We show up at the festival and notice Shawn (haha) working security in the St. Stans parking lot. WTF? I was like, "Dude, get that crap uniform off and come drink!" Of course he didnt, but hey, I'm a good friend and think that if you're working for parking lot security, you need to just stop right then and take a damn good look at yourself.

Anyway, you all know how St. Stans is. Get booze, do a lap, get booze, do a lap, get booze, do a lap...all while talking to people you haven't seen in awhile and catching up. It really is a good time, which I enjoy very much. Well, around 1030 each of us except Bill is well beyond plastered. I'm talking to god knows who about god knows what, and it's one of the few time each year my family can see me out of my mind, and not be mad about the whole deal. So we start to leave to head to Midland St. On the way out we had about 4 girls tagging along to our "group" the entire night. We had no idea who they were, but hey, who am I to tell girls not to hang around us??? We are heading through the parking lot and I proceed to give it to Shawn about how if I dont see him at our house later that night, im gonna kick his ass. As we load into Bill's car, I get in back, as usual, and one of the random girls climb in with me. SCORE! haha, just kidding. I need to get some composure back before getting to Midland St. So, I decide to lay down and/or take a nap on the way over. I just put my head in this random girls lap and start talking about who knows what, but I do remember everyone laughing about whatever I was saying. Now instantly this girl thinks I have interest in her because of my head in her lap. (Tip for pickup moves all, just lay on whoever you like and it'll work itself out, well, probably)

We show up to The Pharmacy bar on Midland St. (This is when that bar was "THE PLACE") and Bill is about ready to kill me because of my drunken ramblings. We all show up and this place looks like the festival moved here. Wall to wall traffic, which I love by the way.We all order more beer, and these girls are unstoppable. Why a few of the dudes didn't like them hangin around, I still dont know, but whatever. I decide it would be a good idea to go dancing with everyone and do a flip off the little mini-window stage the have. So, yeah, I do a flip of the stage right onto Brad, knocking him back into some girl. This leads to her dumping her beer all over her friend, which leads to her friend dumping her beer purposely all over Brad (like it was his fault), yet he is so sweaty from this place, he seems to enjoy it, and then keeps dancing. Now, this place is bumping until about 2am. Once we leave, I start talking to people and forget about leaving with the dudes. All of a sudden another girls comes up to me outside and starts grabbing at me and "hugging" and stuff. Now, I havent seen this girl all night long, but hey, nothing wrong with some 2am affection right?

She decided to somehow figure out that Taco Bell was my weakness, probably because it was the only place open at the time, and asks if I want to get some food. Of course I say, off to her car. Now, I didnt know this but Bill saw me getting into her car, so he figured I was getting a ride home. So they all split for the house. In the 5 minutes it takes to get to Taco Bell, she is driving and trying to "rub my leg" the entire way. If you know me, you know I dont just let people, who's name I dont even know, start getting their way with me. (Maybe in retrospect, i shouldve not had this policy, haha) I just keep playing this like no big deal until I get my food. I did not want this girl knowing where I lived, so when she asked where to go, I said back to the bar, hoping my friends would still be outside there. We get back and I have her drive around the block a few times to see their car, which of course is not there. I say keep circling, because I had to build up the nerve of when to jump out of her moving car.

So yeah, we hit some stop sign and i book it! Heading for the hills! I just started running down Midland St towards the Liberty Bridge. She goes to pull up, to "trap" me and I bolt down to the base of the bridge, frantically calling Bill to come get me. As i'm running explaining where I am, he's laughing his ass off thinking I'm scared of some girl. Regardless, im under the Liberty Bridge, drunk, waiting for a car to come get me. They pull up and cannot believe what the hell i'm talking about, but say that they called a bunch of people and we're now partying at our house. We all pull up to the house, still locked like when we left. No one has arrived yet and all the lights are off, except the bathroom light...

We open the front door and look to see the light on, which no one left on. Now, all being drunk we're thinking some Pulp Fiction bathroom machine gun scene is gonna go down. We start talking quietly getting a bat from behind the couch and lining up to knock a home run with whomever head is coming out of there. The door open and out pops...Jenny. I swear she doesnt know how close she was to a concussion that second. I think it was Ryan that grabbed the end of the bat to make sure it wasn't swung. Evey one is yelling like, "How'd you get in?" and all that, and she answers, "Through the window." What??? hahaha, Jenny, you climbed through the damn window. Now everyone remembers we had a big porch, you couldve just waited 5 minutes.

So over the next 3 hours we keep drinking and talking to everyone over, and lighting more fireworks off of the lawn pissing the neighbors off, and then I went outside to talk to our friend Dana who was sitting on the lawn. Now I did like Dana for awhile, so I thought , Perfect! Outside talking Bill decides to start "working out" on the lawn at 4am doing push-ups and jumping off of random tree stumps or something, trying to look cool. As the night turned to morning, I remember laying back to look at the stars, then the next sound I hear is at 10am, and it's a damn lawn mower.

I asked Dana the next day why the hell she let me fall asleep 5 inches from the sidewalk. Her reply was, I went inside to go to your room, and you said you'll be upstairs in 5 minutes. Now, how is that for what I remember? Everything except what would've led to an excellent time. I swear, it's like my brain has selective guidance, and it is set for things that dont make normal sense. You should remember saying to a girl, i'll be in my room in 5 minutes, but you don't. Pfffff, anyway. I wake up 5 inches from the lawn, sunburn face and all and the damn neighbor with the mower is staring at me laughing.

It was a very good night. haha